Review: The Boogens (1981)

Directed by: James L. Conway
Starring: Rebecca Balding, Fred McCarren, Anne-Marie Martin
Written by: David O'Malley, Jim Kouf (as Bob Hunt)
Music by: Bob Summers
Country: United States
Available on: Blu-ray/DVD (Olive Films)
IMDb

Stephen King has proclaimed — at least according to marketing materials — that The Boogens is a “wildly energetic monster movie.” Stephen King was doing a lot of cocaine at the time. What The Boogens is, is a small-time monster movie about some some mutant turtle beasties set loose from an abandoned mine. It’s sort of an aberration from veteran TV director James L. Conway, being the only horror flick he’s made for the big screen. But the man has worked on a ton of really well-regarded, popular television stuff and his future talent was evident here, even on this tiny, cheap rubber-monstered scale.

The special effects crew made exactly one of the monsters for production and that’s so goddamn obvious right from the get-go. The first third of the movie has no boogens at all, the second third has off-screen boogens tentacles and POV boogens-vision, and the last third has no more than one boogen on screen at a time. And there’s a total of like six actors. So, there’s not a lot of wild energy, despite King’s drug-addled claims. But the intimacy of its cast and the snowy mountain town really works. This was made at a time when filmmakers didn’t feel compelled to rush right into the flesh flashing and ripping, so there’s some opportunity to acquaint yourself with a likable group of characters and immerse yourself in the film’s low-key ambiance.

Although there is some nudity and light gore, there is a very charming and simple earnestness here. The production company, Taft International Pictures, used to churn out family-friendly stuff prior to a buyout, and that latent geniality shines through. Everyone in the movie means well and is doing their gosh-darned best (although everyone’s always very, very upset with the dog, Tiger, who’s constantly interrupting sexytimes and barking at absolutely nothing (well, at boogens, but no one’s gonna believe that … Tiger’s cried wolf too many times)). Conway and his team do a lovely job of leveraging the picturesque snow-capped mountains and moody subterranean locales to fullest effect and, despite the distinct lack of boogens, there’s a generous heaping of suspense, helped by a pleasantly ominous score that isn’t trying to do too much.

There are no crazy plot twists, shocking moments of violence, or any of the other tricks utilized to keep an audience on its toes. What we’ve got is an old-fashioned monster movie made by folks who know the stuff they need to know to tell a good story well. I guess I would have preferred a few more moments of creature carnage, but The Boogens is honestly one of the most pleasant movie-viewing experiences I’ve had in a while, and that is really something. It’s like a nice old couple inviting you in for breakfast even though they just met you. Sure, it’s just standard shit like coffee, eggs, bacon, and toast, but it was made with disarmingly good intentions and those classics have never left you hungry.

Overall rating: 7.5 out of 10