Review: Amityville Dollhouse (1996)
Directed by: Steve White
Starring: Robin Thomas, Starr Andreeff, Allen Cutler
Written by: Joshua Michael Stern
Music by: Ray Colcord
Country: United States
Available on: Blu-ray (Vinegar Syndrome)
IMDb
Amityville Dollhouse is the eighth entry in the film franchise. It has absolutely nothing to do with The Amityville Horror (1979), other than it featuring a dollhouse replica of the DeFeo house. But the screenplay doesn’t bother explaining why there’s a dollhouse replica of the DeFeo house. But there is one, and it’s evil — again, for reasons unexplained. And it’s ended up in a shack near the home of newlyweds Bill and Claire Martin, who each have kids from previous marriages that are coming together, Brandy Bunch-style. (Bill is played by Robin Thomas, the principal from Summer School (1987). I kept waiting for Chainsaw and Dave to show up and get scolded. Never happened.) The Martins bring the dollhouse into their home and strange, scary occurrences pop up. But you’d never know it, because none of the actors are good enough to suitably express fear. The kid actors are all just the worst. But despite the nonsensical story and bad acting, there’s actually a lot of cool stuff here. The movies works a lot better as a random collection of effective imagery — like the zombie version of Claire’s dead first husband, who has taken notes from Big Ben from House (1986); a trio of creepy demons hanging out in the attic; a fireplace that loves to spontaneously set people on fire; and some effective lighting and smoke effects. In many ways, this entry is similar to Amityville 1992: It’s About Time. Both feature inexplicably haunted items, some interesting spooky shenanigans, stories that are so very loosely tethered to the franchise, and recognizable ‘80s character actors in starring roles. They’re also both solid flicks that will provide 90 minutes of fun if you unscrew your skullcap and put your brain on the nightstand next to your affection for the original films.
Overall rating: 6.5 out of 10
